Sermon notes
Prayers
Sentence
The grass may wither, the flower fade,
but the word of our God will endure for ever.
Isaiah 40 : 8 Collect (Common Order, page 678)
Almighty God, you have made us for yourself,
and our hearts are restless till they find their rest in you. Give us peace in your service, and in the world to come the joy of seeing you face to face; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever.
Call to Worship
Come – you are invited to listen to God’s word that it may be a light on your path. Come – you are invited to bring your praises to God that you may acknowledge his greatness. Come – for this invitation is for you, however you may feel life is treating you. Come – because God created you, God loves you and God welcomes you.
we have come together to worship you, a mixed bunch of people, each with our own problems, concerns and joys, but all knowing that you are here with us, waiting to speak your word, ready to listen, to bless, to lead us. For our part, we bring you our hymns and our reading of your word, our thinking and our listening, our praying and our doubts.
We bring the fellowship we share, the discipleship we offer, the world of which we are part, and the lives you have given us. Receive all that we bring, Father, that we might receive all that you have for us.
And as part of what we bring, we bring you our confession of failings and failures: the times when our discipleship has been half-hearted; the times when we’ve sung Jesus’ praise but failed to follow in his footsteps;
the times when we’ve expected others to serve us but we’ve failed to serve them. And so, Lord, for all such times and for anything else that weighs heavily on our hearts and which we now confess to you in the silence we ask that you will forgive us. (silence)
In gratitude for your many gifts, we lay this offering before you, a token of our offering of our very selves, asking that we may serve you and others to the glory of your name.
Lord, hear our prayer and change our lives that we might be better disciples of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, in whose name we ask it. Amen
Relating to others, Understanding grace Matt 22 :37-40 Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbour as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
We are to love others as we love ourselves, how can we love the seemingly unlovable? Left to ourselves we can’t do it! But God would never ask us to do the impossible. In Christ we have the freedom to relate to others as God intended.
Just knowing who we are in Christ is the foundation for our Christian life and growth in maturity, it also forms the basis for the way we relate to others “we love because he first loved us” 1 John 4:19. We give freely because we have received freely (Matthew 10:8), We are merciful because he has been merciful to us, Luke 6:36, and we forgive in the same way that Jesus has forgiven us, Ephesians 4:32.
We cannot do this if we haven’t got a handle on what grace means for us. “Grace is giving people what they don’t deserve”, undeserved favour, it cannot be earned. Salvation is a free gift and we owe God nothing for it, but when we receive his grace, a strange thing happens. We discover that it really is more blessed to give than to receive (acts 20:35) We find we want to give it away to others
We are responsible for our own character and Other’s needs What are our responsibilities to others? And what rights do we have regarding others?
You ever listen to another couple’s argument? You know that they eventually start attacking people’s character, while looking out for their own needs, you’re selfish, you never help me, never and always! If there is a relationship with that orientation then there is trouble, because it is the exact opposite of how God says our relationships should be. Consider these two passages
Romans 14:4 Who are you to judge someone else's servant? To his own master he stands or falls. And he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand. Someone else’s character is not your concern! It is for that person and God, we are not to judge, each person is responsible before God for their character
Phil 2:3-5 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus
Where we do have a responsibility towards others before God, it is to meet their needs. So we can clearly see that we are responsible for 2 things out own character and meeting the needs of others.
Imagine what life would be like if everyone assumed their responsibility to become like Christ in their character and committed themselves to meet the needs of everyone! That would be heaven on earth!
Being aware of our own sins no one would disagree with that. The big question is why we fail to live it out, too often we are very aware of the failures in other people’s characters, while being blind to our own. Much of this is to do with the condition of our relationship with God.
We look forward to seeing Jesus in his fullness some day, the bible teaches that after the fall no one has fully seen God, some have seen the back of God, or a vision of God, Isaiah ch 6 shows the prophets vision of God on his throne, with his robe filling the temple, and as he saw God, not even fully, he cries out woe is me, I am unclean with unclean lips, when confronted with God does he care what someone else is up to? No it is only his own sin he is worried about, same with us, when we meet with God it is our sin that is our concern not anybody else’s!
Luke ch 5, Jesus uses Peter’s boat to speak to the crowd, Peter had been fishing all night and got nothing, Jesus says to him, go out into the deep water, let your nets down for a catch, he then catches fish after fish, his response is not go away from me I am married to a sinful woman, no what he says is go away from me I am a sinful man.
When we see who God is we don’t care about the sins of others but of our own sin. However, when we are lukewarm in our relationship with God, we tend to overlook our sin and see the sins of others. When they don’t match up to our expectations, we have a tendency to say they are doing wrong and to want to point it out. Our responsibility however is not for their character but for our own character.
Focus on responsibilities rather than rights What right do we have to expect anything from anyone else? Or do we have a responsibility to love one another, care for one another, In every relationship we have both rights and responsibilities- but where should we put the emphasis? Satan will tempt us to focus on our rights rather our responsibilities.
A husband could get angry with his wife because he thinks he has a right to expect her to be submissive. A wife may nag her husband because she expects him to be the spiritual head of the household. Do husbands have a right to expect their wives to be submissive? Or do they have a responsibility to love their wives as Christ loved the Church. Do wives have a right to expect their husbands to love them? Or do they have a responsibility to love and respect their husbands who in turn have the responsibility of being the head of the home?
Husbands, having a submissive wife is not your right, but being a loving, caring husband is your responsibility, being head of the house is not a right to be demanded but an awesome responsibility to be fulfilled. Wife having a spiritual husband is not your right, but being a submissive and supportive wife is your responsibility, focus on your responsibilities, when we stand before Christ, he will not ask us whether we received everything we had coming to us, he will reward us for how well we fulfilled our responsibilities.
Do parents have a right to expect their children to be obedient? Or do they have a responsibility to bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord and discipline them when they are disobedient?
Does being a member of a local church give you the right to criticise others? Or does it give you a responsibility to submit to those in authority over you and relate to one another with the same love and acceptance we have received from Christ? Being a member of the church is an incredible privilege, this privilege comes with the awesome responsibility to behave as God’s children and love God and others.
Of course we all have rights, everybody has a right to be loved, accepted, no matter colour, creed, but we must not hold on to our rights and sacrifice our responsibilities, that is what the world wants, you to demand your rights, forget your responsibilities and sow the seeds of destruction.
What about when others do wrong well all well and good Keith, but what happens when they make a huge mistake? Can we not be their conscience? Can we not tell them exactly where they have gone wrong? All of us find it difficult to won up and say “yes I did it”, too often we see the issues in someone else’s life much more clearly than in our own! Should we try to be the conscience of another person and show them their sin? Nope that is the job of the Holy Spirit, playing the role of God in someone else’s oddly enough will not work! The moment we try and we do try, we take their struggle with God upon ourselves and we are not up to the task. The holy Spirit is the one who convicts us of our sins. The critic is tempted to protest “But I have the gift of condemnation!” actually God has given us the gift of reconciliation, but the critical spirit says, but doesn’t love expose a multitude of sins, no Peter tells us love covers a multitude of sins! (1 peter 4:8)
Discipline yes, judgement no! Well if I can’t condemn, what should I do to keep someone from sinning? Christians do sin, and this affects our relationship with God and others, should you just ignore it, are there ever occasions where I should confront another Christian? How do these verses go together? “do not judge or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others you will be judged” Matt 7:1 and “if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore them gently” Gal 6:1
How can we reconcile the fact that we are not to judge, but we are to carry out discipline? Judgment is not the same as discipline; judgement is related to character, whereas discipline is always related to behaviour, discipline is based on something we have seen or heard, if we see someone sinning against us we are to confront them alone, so we can win them back to God, if they don’t repent then we are to take along tow or three who have seen it too, if they still wont, listen then we bring it to the Church (matt 18) the purpose of this process is not to condemn, but to restore. If there are no witnesses, your word against theirs, leave it alone, God knows, he will deal with it in his wisdom.
We are so often tempted to judge character, however if you catch someone telling a lie and you confront them saying “you have told a lie” Have you judged them? They may think so, but you have simply called attention to sinful behaviour that you have seen.
However if you shout “you are a liar!” that is judgement! Because you have attacked his character, what you think is discipline is in fact character assassination, he is not a liar, he is a child of God who has told a lie, when you call someone stupid, clumsy, proud, evil, you attack their character and it leaves them nowhere to turn because you can’t change character instantly.
If on the other hand you point out their behaviour to them you are giving them something to work with, “ you are right what I said wasn’t true, I am sorry will you forgive me” Saying something like that puts an end to the matter and leaves no scars
If we could memorise and never go against Ephesians 4:29 most of the problems in our homes and churches would disappear! “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful and verse 30, do not grieve the holy spirit. It grieves God when we use words that tear another down instead of using words to build each other up. If you have taken hold of your freedom in Christ, you are free to make the right choice in any situation
Discipline and punishment are not the same punishment is related to the OT concept of an eye for an eye, punishment looks back to the past, whereas discipline looks to the future, Hebrews 12 tells us discipline is a sign of God’s love, if we are not being discipline by God then we are illegitimate children of God. In the same way if we feel we have to approach someone we do it with love, in order to equip them for the future! God does not punish us for our mistakes, our punishment has fallen on Christ, he disciplines us so we will not make the same mistakes again “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful, later on however it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it” Hebrews 12:11 The point of discipline it to help someone become more like Jesus, not to punish them for behaving badly!
When we are attacked Ok what happens when the boot is on the other foot? When someone attacks our character? Should we be defensive? We are certainly tempted to, how did Jesus react? When insulted he did not retaliate, when he suffered he made not threats, instead he trusted himself to him who judges justly 1 peter 2:23. Now we are alive in Christ and forgiven, we do not need to defend ourselves, if you are wrong you don’t have a defence if you are right you don’t need one, Christ is our defence.
Woman/pastor/ good points/bad points about him 2 good ones, page of bad ones, he was tempted to defend himself, but said nothing, “it must have taken a lot of courage to share that with me, what do you suggest I do?” She then burst into tears, saying “not you it’s me” and a discussion ensued so she discovered her own ministry suited to her gifts. If the minister had defended himself, what then? The lady would have been convinced her calling was to convince him he was not yet qualified to be a member of the trinity!
If you can learn not to be defensive when someone attacks your character or performance, you may have a real opportunity to turn it around and minister to that person.
Student heard that story, he was doing supply work, got a call from an irate mother, tore him apart, worst teacher my daughter has ever had, he was desperate to get off the phone, but remembering the story kept quiet, then responded “took courage, what would you have me do?”, guess what, tears flowed, relationship restored. Mum was single mum, rebellious daughter had been saying all sorts about the teacher, they were both Christians, they committed themselves to pray for the daughter.
Nobody tears down another person from a position of strength, those who are critical of others are either hurting or immature, if we learn not to be defensive when they attack us, it can lead to an opportunity to minister to them.
Authority and accountability God has given us lines of authority to avoid anarchy in our society, we also have a great need for accountability, think of these 4 words and ask yourself in what way did God first come to you? Authority, accountability, affirmation, acceptance. How you answer this question reveals a lot about you, and how you understand ministry marriage and parenting Paul wrote while we were still sinners Christ died for us, acceptance came firstly, then affirmation “the spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children”
The world the devil are desperate to distort our image of God, to get things back to front, if you see God as a consuming fire first and foremost, as a holy God and you a sinner, you will never get close, but first of all if you see him as a loving father who loves and accepts you as you are, you can get close to him and grow in him.
If authority figures demand accountability, without affirmation and acceptance they will never get it, people may comply on the outside, but they will never share anything intimately, but people will submit to authority when it is first of all accepting and affirming.
Teenager home late, parent reads riot act, where have you been? Out! What were you doing? Nothing!
In the gospels Jesus never says anything like this “I am the Son of God get your act together! He is God but he came as the gentle shepherd, but they were amazed at his teaching as he taught with authority, it came not from a position but from his character, when we see people struggling with sin, we need to learn to be like God, come alongside with an attitude of acceptance rather than rejection without a shred of condemnation but filled with love.
Should we express our needs? Should we suffer in silence then? Or is it ok to express our needs? We all have needs and we are allowed to tell others if they are not meeting our needs, but we have to be careful how we express them, state it as a need not a judgement, “you don’t love me do you?” course I do” case closed, but if she says “I don’t feel loved just now” the husband now has a chance to meet that need, husband could also say “you make me feel useless” he could say “ I feel unimportant”, there is no accusation or blame and there is opportunity to help meet that need.
One of life’s little secrets everyone of us needs to be loved, accepted and affirmed, today after church go home and phone someone who wasn’t here, tell them they are a real encouragement to you, that they build you up and you love having their company. Maybe you are waiting for someone to do that to you, it may never happen, but that is one of life’s secrets, not very secret, “you reap what you sow”
Jesus said it is more blessed to give than to receive, when you help someone else you are helped too, if you want someone to love you, love them, if you want a friend be a friend, you get out of life what you put into it Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." Luke 6:38, if we do enough to get by, we rob ourselves. Jesus talking about a bushel of wheat, you fill the basket, then you scrape off the top with a board, fair measure, Lord is saying we fill it until it over flows, and shake it so it settles done and what we measure out to others will come back to us. Meant to start work at 9? start at 8:45 do that with everything and you will be amazed what life has to offer.
Farmer baker, butter, bread, weigh it to the bread scales
"People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centred. Love them anyway. If you do good, people may accuse you of selfish motives. Do good anyway. If you are successful, you may win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway. The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway. People who really want help may attack you if you help them. Help them anyway. Give the world the best you have and you may get hurt. Give the world your best anyway."
Be the person God created you to be, no matter what the world says
Prayers of dedication, thanksgiving and intercession Father, we have so much to thank you for: our lives, our talents, our families and friends; but especially your coming to us in Jesus Christ. As we bring you our thanks, we recall the wonders of this world of your creation, and your making us, male and female, in your image. We thank you, too, that through the centuries you have not only been patient with us, but even sent your Son to bring us back to you. In his living and dying, he showed us the greatness of service, the strength of weakness and the power of love. Even then, Lord, you have not left us alone for you have sent us your Holy Spirit to strengthen and inspire us to service. For all these acts of grace and love we offer you our heartfelt thanks.
Loving God, as we pray for your world, we thank you that you value all people, that all are important in your eyes, with none more or less so. And so we pray for all who have lost that sense of perspective. We think of those who have fallen into the error of pride, and ask that you will help them to recognize their weaknesses as well as their strengths. We think of those who feel themselves to be worthless, unimportant, unvalued, or unloved – victims of broken homes and broken relationships, the powerless and the poor, the homeless and refugees, the shy and depressed, the lonely and rejected. Grant them the assurance that, whatever their circumstances, they are precious to you. Give them all a proper sense of their own value, a true appreciation of the worth of others, and, above all, an understanding of your greatness, beside which we are nothing, and yet through which you count us as your children. Lord, we ask that you will hear this our prayer through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Benediction Go back out into God’s world strengthened by God’s word - that that word might be a light to your feet and a lamp to your path. And the blessing of God almighty, the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, be with you this day and always. Amen
